He is Faithful

The last couple of months have been hectic in the Tarno household. I remember about a month ago saying to God "I can't take anything else happening, I am reaching my limit on what I can handle" Then the washing machine goes out and we have to replace it. I say to God again "I really think I am at my maximum of what I can handle, please no more" Another week and a half go by and I am told that I will no longer have a job after two weeks. I thought to myself but didn't directly tell God..how are we going to handle this. I was quickly filled with doubt and discouragement but the Lord spoke to me and said "put your trust in me." Somedays I have been strong and I know without a shadow of a doubt the Lord will provide and that every season has it's purpose. Other days I want to break down and cry because I feel so helpless. So I really thought this was it..I am at the maximum now. Last night we did our taxes and wouldn't you know we owe close to $2000. It punched me in the stomach and I felt so defeated but tried to hide some of it as I watched my husband's concerned face. I stayed at my mom's house a little longer and just talked to her. On the way home and while I tossed and turned trying to go to sleep I realized I have been telling God I can't handle anything else...I am at my maximum and more and more gets put on me. The weight is more than I can take and you know what that is exactly what God wants. He knows we can't do this on our own, He knows that this is more than we can handle...He wants us to give it to him and let him take care of it. He wants me to feel helpless because I am helpless. He wants me to know I can't do this on my own and He is the way, He is how we handle this. So today, I am giving it to God. We will trust in him and bring our burden to Him for HE IS FAITHFUL!!!

Curve Ball or Bump in the road..either way it is change

Well my gut has been telling me that this was coming due to the financial position of my current job and last night I was given notice that I would no longer have a job in two weeks. Though I suspected it was coming it doesn’t soften the blow. Troy and I are turning to God as we embark on this next journey. I have been sending out my resume for a few weeks now and hoping that I will find something soon. I have two interviews scheduled for Monday so that is great news!!

Troy and I have faced many obstacles in our less than 2 year marriage. This will be my second lay off in these two years, my health issues, our financial struggles but God has always seen us through. Last night when I walked in our house and my entire body wanted to break down and cry, my husband grabbed me in his arms and told me everything will be alright as long as we have each other. Those words could not have been more perfect. I have wanted to break down, I have wanted to lose hope but I serve a God who is faithful and never failing. We are putting our trust in Him and know that we are exactly where he wants us. I am going to continue to pray that God will fill me with positive thoughts, his abundance and faithfulness.

Outside of the job situation, Troy and I have decided to put our “attempting pregnancy” on hold. We had decided to start trying in April and now feel that this is not the right time. I can rationalize it but our spirits are broken. This is something we have been looking forward to but at this time I am feeling overwhelmed and lost. I know there is never a perfect time to bring a child into this world but we need to get through this next hurtle first. We will continue to seek God with this decision but until we hear what He wants for us I feel it is best to wait.

I am managing throughout the day and fighting as tears want to fill my eyes. I don't know why this is hitting me so hard. I guess you really can't ever prepare for these things. I just don't like being unstable or unsettled. But I know God has plans for me. This past week I have been stressing out about turning the big 3-0. I haven't wanted to embrace this age change and felt that I was mourning the loss of my 20's. To some of you out there I am sure this just seems ridiculous but for me it was kind of a big deal. With all this comotion going on though turning 30 has become the least of my worries. So I am going to try and embrace them. Maybe this was a sign that there are greater things ahead and God is wanting me to change so drastically that I have to go through this season.

Jeremiah 29:11 For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

I am grabbing hold of the word and trusting in Him. Our Future is in God's hands...whose better to be in.

Clean Eating

So I have started to invest in my health more so than ever. I really want to be an overall healthy person. I want to loose weight but do it a healthy natural way. I had been a huge WW fan until I realized how much they promote processed foods. I know you can do their plan anyway you choose but I just felt this time around that wouldn't be the route for me. I started seeing a Nutrionalist who has been my doctor in the past for all the crazy intestional/digestive issues I have had and am now doing a raw/healthy lifestyle. I mainly eat vegetables, fruits, lean proteins, nuts/seeds, oils, and legumes. It really hasn't been as hard as I thought. I miss the snacking on something crunchy other than veggies and of course my dairy but I will only be missing the dairy until I get a large portion of the weight off then will slowly introduce it back into my lifestyle. I have felt so much better and am really encouraged. I am not only trying to regain health by loosing weight but I am feeding my body with what it needs and what will help my internal body regain health. I am on week three and have done one weigh in so far a week ago and lost 9 pounds, it was a great start. Really excited to see how this whole things turns out

Somebody help me decorate my house!!!

So I have always wanted a cool, trendy, modern, with maybe a hint of vintage in my house. God so did not gift me with style so I am looking to others for their creativity and hopefully one day will be able to have a house that I love.

So here are some few things I have run across that I want to use as my inspiration.






I love the pop of color that these chairs bring. It takes an ordinary brown table from dull and nothing exciting to WOW!!



So this chair has my name written all over it, now just to find one somewhere and hope I can afford it then convince my hubby that it would be a perfect addition to our home






Love these too, I think I can pull this off with some things I already have.

I Sought Love

Found this the other day...(don't know when I wrote this)

I first sought love to fill a void
A void that penetrated deep within my heart
A heart broken from unhappiness

I sought love to experience compassion- to gain serenity
And peace of mind

I sought love to rid my soul of loneliness
Loneliness that darkened clouds and dampened spirits

I sought love to experience a mystical existence- to enjoy the bliss of ecstacy and be overwhelmed in delight

I found love from the first sweet taste of your lips on mine
I found love in the happiness you brought and in the experience of your very being
I found love when you took me away in those passionate moments and let me get a glimpse of heaven
I found love that brightened my once darkened skies, a love that makes me higher than any mountains peak
I found love in a man whom I adore
I found love when I found you

I am the "Sick Girl"

I have recently noticed that everytime I see someone the first thing they ask me is "how are you feeling" Though I really do appreciate the care and concern I am really not liking being the sick girl. I have spent the last 5 years dealing with crazy health issues. I hate that I get sick, I hate that I have been sick and I hate that while in the process of healing I will continue to be sick.

I have found a wonderful Doctor, she is like a whole new world to me. I call her my voodoo Doctor. I never really thought to go the natural route but I truly am a believer in holistic healing. Life has been much better since meeting the voodoo doctor. I went from being so sick, not being able to eat anything, my body storing everything I ate because it was in constant starvation mode, being deathly ill because of toxins and parasites that were running rampid inside of me. Though the first couple of times meeting with this doctor I was horrified to find out what was wrong we have made tremendous progress. I can eat, and now I choose to eat a raw clean healthy diet. Everything I put in my body is fresh, I try and avoid processed foods all together and I am feeling great. The problem is I am still "sick" girl.

I will always have migraines, there is no cure, there is only constant modification, trial and error. I wish I could find relief but I am so grateful with how far I have come. I will continue the path to less frequent occurences as well as I can.

But sometimes I just want to scream really I am getting healthy...I feel so much better than I ever have and I am a work in progress. Though I hit rough spots with my migraines and catch a cold or two I am on the mend and for that I am grateful....Now if I can just loose the title of "SICK GIRL"

God's greatest gifts come in unique packages

It's nice to be reminded how wonderful life is. Everytime I get the chance to visit with my nephews, my heart is filled with overwhelming happiness. I have yet to experience what it feels like to be a parent, but I can say being an AUNTIE is one of life's greatest gifts. I am truly blessed to be the Aunt to some amazing little people. It makes me wonder how great God must feel when he looks down at all his sons and daughters. I have the priveledge to watch these little miracles grow and I consider myself super lucky to have these wonderful boys in my life.

Kenna got a red star for best defense...and she scored 4 points!! Way to go Kenna that is so awesome. Mylie gets the white star for most Christlike.

Glad that we live in a generation where we are constantly feed what is happening in other people's lives. These were the latest and greatest posts from my sister in love Misti.

I am so proud of the two beautiful girls that her and Steve are raising. You know they have done a great job when you are around these to precious girls. I am so honored to be their Aunt and to share their lives with them. They are really incredible and it's moments like these that just scream to the world how great they are. I love these two so much and wish we were able to part of their everyday lives. But we watch from the sidelines and they truly make my heart smile. I am so blessed!!

Control Freak

So I know that I have Control issues and I keep trying to rid myself of the need to control. Just when I thought I was getting better at it..BAM!!! Troy and I are currently looking for a new place to live. We are wanting to rent a house or a townhouse but every corner we turn leads us to disappointment. Every property I have found interesting or overwhelmingly excited about, the realtor has just got an offer for. We have two months until our lease is up and I should be able to say ok I have two months but instead I am freaking out and thinking...Great we will have no place to live.

So we are hoping something wonderful comes our way. Until then I will just be the spaz that feels like she is going to be homeless.

Christmas in the Frozen Tundra

This year Christmas was a little different. We spend every other year in Minnesota for Christmas but were missing part of the family so it just wasn't the same. The absence of Steve, Misti, Mylie and Kenna was greatly felt but we still managed to open presents all together via Skype. We were all really grateful for that.

I got to meet the latest addition to the Tarno clan and boy did I fall in love with that little guy. I forgot just how great little bundles of joy are. Briggs definitely stole the show around that house. It was so great just to spend time with everyone, especially the kiddos Breana and Briley. I really miss seeing them and they are such great kids. I am so lucky to be their Aunt.

Christmas day we spent at Aunt Nancy's and that is pretty much my favorite part of the trip. I love having the whole family get together and spend time with one another. I was plagued with a migraine so didn't have as much fun as I intended but still it was such a wonderful blessing to be there.

Danea, Mark and the kids were able to be in MN the same time so it was great to see them.

After Christmas we traveled up to Esko and had a blast hanging out with Desi, Tony, Stone, Dea, Gale, Heath, little Heath, Easton, Judy, Craig and Gene and Jill. I got to meet Troy's friends Mandy and Matt and just love them. We enjoyed our time there and then headed back to the cities.

We got to have multiple dinners with friends. We enjoyed haning out with Joe and Erica and meeting that handsome sweet little angel Alex. Then we had a great time scarfing down some Mexican food at my favorite restaraunt Don Pablo's with Karissa and Robert. We always wish we could see them more when we are there and will have to do better at it next time around.

We had such a sweet blessing by having dinner with Rhonda and Ed before they headed off to Amsterdam for a year. They are so near and dear to our hearts.

So overall we had a great time. We missed not having the whole family together but managed to enjoy to time with the ones we did have. I can't wait to go back to Minnesota for a visit. I really would love to see how fall is there. I have only endured the cold winters and the late spring.







This was Troy's little slice of Heaven!!!!