Overwhelmed

Life has a way of getting your attention. This year has been a trying one. I have prayed, begged and pleaded to God that I can not handle anything else, that I am at my max for what I can take and more and more is being piled on me. I have reached breaking points, I have laid in my bed and cried and cried. I have felt defeated, OVERWHELMED, stressed to the max. I have lost faith a couple of times and have really acted like I do not serve a God that can and will. Jesus has never left my side though. He has been my strength when I thought I had none and he has done so many things to get my attention. One thing I love, is that when Satan is trying to grab me, JESUS steps in and defeats him. He is our conquerer. Recently I gave up, I just wanted to crawl in a hole and let everything consume me. God showed up in every conversation, every thought, every moment. He sent me little reminders of who HE is, what HE can do, how when I have little faith He won't leave me. He will pursue me even in my moments of doubts, even in those moments when I throw my hands up and give up.

I feel like so many points in my life I have said that I have never needed Christ more than I do now. He is showing me that I need Him every day, every hour, every minute, every second. Part of why I struggle, why He allows me to be overwhelmed is to remind me that HE CAN when I can't and I need to give it all over to Him. He is more than enough and I truly can't do it on my own.

I know I will struggle in the overwhelmed, I will have those moments when I loose site of Jesus and His promises, I will feel as though God has forsaked me, but He will never leave my side, He will never stop pursuing me and telling me to just have Faith. How awesome and wonderful is that.

I have one amazing Heavenly Father, what more could I need.