Marriage- Committment

Here are some more things I have learned through books, scripture and Weekend to Remember. I made a covenant before God to stay committed to my marriage no matter the circumstance. I pray that with each passing year as trials and tribulations occur in my marriage that I always remember the I committed to Troy until the day I die or the day he leaves this earth, which ever comes first.

Commitment is a decision to have the abundant marriage God desires, regardless of circumstances or whether you think your spouse is doing their part. This includes:
• Realizing that marriage is an unbreakable covenant before God. Marriage is covenant not a contract, which could be broken, but a binding, permanent agreement — just like the covenant God makes with us.
• Choosing to love someone whether you Feel “love” or not. We often let our feelings dictate our actions, but we are actually built for the opposite. Our Creator has designed us so that when we love another person with our actions, our feelings inevitably follow. You may not always feel like loving someone, and a marriage love is a choice to love that person no matter what (Choice not feeling)
• Engaging in Christian community, prayer and discipleship — especially when you don't want to. These three aspects of the Christian life help sustain every believer, but they are particularly essential for those going through a difficult season.
• Not pointing out the flaws of your spouse but recognizing the good in them and the sin in yourself. If you're dissatisfied with your marriage, try this challenge: For the next 30 days, don't say anything negative about your spouse — neither to him or her nor to anyone else. Every day, find something you appreciate about your spouse, and verbalize it. This marital application of Philippians 4:8 (which instructs us to focus on whatever is praiseworthy) has the power to transform a marriage. When we examine and work to change ourselves, we often bring out the best in our spouse as well.
• Realizing that you cannot change your spouse. When you married them you accepted them for who they were. That doesn’t mean you or your spouse do not have things to we need to change, but too many times we feel like we can change the person we are with. We only have the power to pray for our spouse and ask that God reveal to them what may or may not need to change. Reflect on yourself, many times we are the ones in need of change
• Relying on God to help you put your spouse’s needs above your own and to make pleasing God your priority not making yourself happy. God calls us to grow in relationship with Him, to make Him our number one priority then our spouse. Doing something because God commands you to not because your spouse may or may not deserve it.
• Allow each other to openly talk about temptations, weaknesses, etc. When we commit to one another we must know that the world doesn’t stop and we are not in a bubble. Build a strong foundation with your marriage and create safeguards. Also allow the other person to come to you for help, advice, or concern about things that tempt them. We all have some sort of temptations and Satan is alive and trying to destroy marriages. When you both attack issues face on, together in unity with God you can win the fight against Satan’s attack. One area of temptation is affairs, and they are not just physical and emotional. Anything that takes up our time and consumes us away from our marriage can be considered an affair.
o Activity Affairs- busy, busy, busy You have so much going on and are constantly on the go that you never have time for one another
o Work Affair- you make your career a priority above all else and keep adding more demands to keep you away from your family and keep you distracted
o Materialism Affair- you are consumed with things and what you can have and will have to the point that it consumes you
o Children- Your sole focus is on your children and you are so consumed with them and what their needs are. You never take time for you and your spouse because that would take time away from your kids. You only focus your interactions with your spouse about your children. You have a child centered and child focused home (which is not how God designed the family)
There are many things that occupy our time and keep us away from our marriage and family but making the commitment that no matter what occurs in the marriage you are committed to one another and to the vows you made before God.